November 2011 -Poem

I don't feel good I don't feel ok I'm downright sick of your using ways you ask for help I come and then you turn off your phone if I need a friend You think you're cool you think you're fine when it comes to birthdays you're first in line to ask me over coz you want gifts or call me up when you're needing a lift you ask for money won't chip in to help with birthdays or funerals you hide on the shelf you take and take and take some more but using is what youre best for you won't housesit or help me out but if you need help you'll scream and shout prepared to take not prepared to give coz absorbing everybody is the only way to live

First Boyfriend - 3 Month Poem

When my first boyfriend and I had our 3 month anniversary.. He didn't remember. It seems that's not all he didn't remember. It slipped his mind that he had photographs of an ex in his wallet.. I think this poem was an attempt to make up for that.. However the relationship really should have ended there. :) Sent: Friday, November 14, 2003 9:21 PM Subject: Hello. Well, sorry I didn't send this to you yesterday, just something I wrote out for three months of going out. Hopefully, I'll be able to make a lot more "three month" poems. I love you so much. What's one love when there's two involved What's one dove when there's a flock of gold It's individuality and it's love evolved Both are so priceless they can never be sold Both take hard work and dedication Both when at peak are worth celebration Both when looked up at can cause revolution A whole new nation, a whole new solution Troubles and pains will still come in onslaught But that's what life's about, it's constantly bought But it'll be beat down 'cuase that's what we have sought All it takes is one love and only two thoughts Two souls to infuse as one to survive And if god honouring at his feet they'll arrive Both still together never to divide both will always be eternally alive That's how I guarantee you'll not go to hell We'll make it together, listen when I tell We'll be protected by this O' holy shell And together picked up if ever we fell I'll always look after you if you promise the same Like a two player life like video game Any time, any place, just give it a name I'll be ther for you to overcome the pain.

Dead

I can fake the smile
but I can't hide the teras
The one who was there
for so many years
but now you're dead
you've gone away
'get over it, move on' they say
freinds have their own family
I'm on the outside
I can't make them care
that you're gone, coz you died
So holidays I must bare them alone
coz no longer can I call on your phone
Brady bunch family I wish that I was
but grew up with you, you're all that I got
so it makes me so mad and it makes me feel blue
when people say your death i should be over too
so i know that it hurts like the salt in the wound
coz i wont stop crying about your death anytime soon

Fleeting Thoughts

delete the past and all you've done
change your name to know noone
hide the sin forget the shame
run away from those that blame
build a shield of solid glass
self defense of all they ask
seeking silence on your side
explosive apprehension died
hollow walls of self control
starting fresh divisive goal
torture manifested self
of hatred honoured on a shelf
to start afresh from those you knew
a painful silence that once grew
and angry thought of solitude
to worry bout impending doom
a metal ball to smash the glass
and shards of shattered do they crash
for sharpness lays down on the floor
a drop of blood will come to pour
and opening a can of worms
individuality discerned
to seek a passageway to scream
to dig a tunnel to your dreams
and where you walk they stand and moan
coz they cant stand, that you stand alone

'Makes me alone"

misunderstood makes me alone
having no home, makes me alone
trapped in 4 walls, makes me alone
transient desires, make me alone
disparragement, makes me alone
the inability to fit in, makes me alone
being unique, makes me alone
individuality, makes me alone
my love of abstract, makes me alone
inability to conform, makes me alone
the desire to fit in, makes me alone
the desperation to leave, makes me alone
appreciating sences, makes me alone
breathing the air, makes me alone
lack of community, makes me alone
the need to feel, makes me alone
the need to bleed, makes me alone
not having somewhere i belong...
makes me alone

Uninvited love..

As most girls know, there comes a time in a lot of opposite sex freindships where one person crosses a boundary. This could be your male friend, or your boyfriends female friend.. Let's hope in this case that it's your male friend.
Four years ago I was in a relationship. Four years ago I had a male friend that I had lunch with most days.. Caught up with regularly.. and thought of only in platonic ways.
After this 'E-mail' which I am about to share, the friendship was ruined. I chose to continue as if nothing had happened, but he confessed he never really wanted friendship afterall.
I didn't believe the 'it's too painful' excuse.. but rather assume that his friendship was never real to begin with.

Poem from a male friend.

Sent: Thursday, November 22, 2007 3:29 PM

Subject: Truth. you don't want to hear it though.

Confusion.

Things that you don't understand and know.

like how my feelings for you seem to grow.

With every look that comes my way.

with every smile from you each day.

With every remark that leaves a fresh scar.

Which burns red hot, like a shooting star.

with every touch of your soft, gentle skin.

Slowly but surely pulling me in to sin.

Feelings are hard, when trying to hide,

Afraid to get to close and let you inside.

I know if i did. I'd be exposing myself.

Just like one of your barbies, stuck on a shelf.

I shouldn't tell you these things that i write.

And that I'm just acting the fool, yet another night

I'm not trying to confuse you or mess with your head.

I'm being genuine. and an honest guy instead.

I'm telling you this. as i feel that i must

My neck in a noose. cos I don't displace trust.

To go on, and lie, and not tell you how i feel.

was pointless, you already knew. Now its Just real.

If you didn't know, Then I'm sorry for this letter.

But in the end. knowing the truth is always better

I know your heart will never lie with me.

Your taken, In love. I know we'll never be.

But know that i care. and I'm here as a friend.

I'll be here for you. From now till the end.

I know that you'll now turn your back on me.

But honest i was, The truth you now see.

There. i wrote this earlier today.

Its all true. It explains why i may be weird around you. why i might hold back. and why i may not.

You wanted to know. I know that by me telling you the truth. you will most likely freak out, and never talk to me again. hence the reason you don't tell a beautiful taken woman that you think she's great and that you have a crush on her, and live to tell about it. :(

I didn't want to vote for you. cos i didn't want you to leave.

Have a great night sky.

My li'l ditty

Well today I sat down with iPhone LaDiDa program and recorded a rap version of 'You Got An STD'. I have loaded it onto my facebook page but can't figure out how to embed it anywhere or I'd share it.
Despite my iPone effort, a friend of mine is going to write a musical score for it and then I'm going to organise with an amazing friend to storyboard and cast, and shoot a fantastic video.

I love being creative. It is my outlet.
Dylan Page

A song inspired by a song.. and a hate email!

So today I saw the video for 'nice guys' on a friends facebook wall. I have to say I found it better than 'jizz in my pants', 'dick in a box', 'I can't hug every cat', and 'that doesn't make you a model'.
It inspired me to sit down and write.. and write I did..
However that was not my only inspiration. I recieved a rather abusive nasty email from my ex who insists that I'm crazy. I was then filled with the desire to sit down and rhyme. Songs are like stories.. best if there is some trusthful weird story that is stranger than fiction.. so here goes.

"YOU GOT AN STD" - BY DYLAN PAIGE

you got an std
you dont deserve a chidk like me
i hope it hurts every time that you pee
so you get reminded of your std

you cheating scum
you make me sick
spots on your bumb
and all over your dick

you lie you cheat you steal and then
you tell crazy stories and you lie to your friends
coz you want them to think
that you're the good guy
i remember in march when you had pinkeye
too many fingers up in your bumb
you got pretty cozy with your berthing chumb

you got an std
you dont deserve a chidk like me
i hope it hurts every time that you pee
so you get reminded of your std

you cheat and you lie
you aint got no friends
they tell me your secrets
time and again
and i tell them about your std
and they say you dont deserve a chick like me


you're skilled with your words
and you know how to flirt
but when it comes to your lies
you just cant hide your dirt
coz you forget your lies
you make a mistake
and its easy to spot
you're nothing but a fake

you got an std
you dont deserve a chidk like me
i hope it hurts every time that you pee
so you get reminded of your std


strippers and clubs
and online porn
youre in a sheeps costume
so it hides your big horns
you picked the wrong girl
to fuck with this time
coz i can outsmart you
and im better at rhyme

you in 40 grand debt
coz your addicted to sex
but when it comes down to
its your right hand that you flex
so your dick is a banana shape
you screwed the wrong girl
now got a life long mistake

addicted to porn with no real pals
not treating your std
infecting all the washington gals
you got it its nasty
its with you for life
you say that you hate me
you dont know im friends with your wife

you got an std
you dont deserve a chidk like me
i hope it hurts every time that you pee
so you get reminded of your std